Awww what a cute littleThief King?
by Mexipina
Summary: Ah the miracle of life. It's considered a blessing for most, but then again when this life is coming from two infamous psychopath's Bakura and Marik Ishtar, it's more of a nightmare for the world. [PSYCHOSHIPPiNG- Bakura x Marik] hints of Angstshipping [MPREG theme but based after the baby is born]
1. Prologue

_**Awww what a cute...Thief King !?**_

Everyone's favorite psychopath's "magically" start a family of their own. But when their child is born, the baby already understands Egyptian, wields the power to send those (and toys) into the Shadow Realm, and it's almost impossible to not mistake this child to be an exact reincarnation of the former thief King of Ancient Egypt! Yet Marik and Bakura clearly insist "nothing" is unusual or wrong with their child, and their baby is a blessing...or curse for everyone else.

_Bakura: HEY!_

_Marik: My offspring is NOT a nightmare_

_Me: Well they're certainly not a sweet dream either._

**Main Couple: Psychoshipping (Bakura x Marik ) side focus pairing : Angstshipping (Malik x Ryou)**

I do not own Yu-gi-oh! or anything about it at all.

* * *

It was just another warm, casual day in the life of Domino City. People were working, dueling, and just minding their own business now that the world was saved from evil. Everything seemed rather normal now that the Pharaoh's conquest was finally finished and the Yami's were capable to live peacefully among the people of their Hikari's time.

"Isn't it great that we can finally relax without any threat to humanity anymore, Pharaoh?" Yugi asked his dark half as him and several friends hung out outside Domino High school.

"I mean I honestly miss the adventure even if it meant nearly killing ourselves." Yami admitted, while Joey jumped up from the bench he was sitting on.

"Oh man, I gotta say we proved to be a killer super hero team! If only we had a movie or a sitcom made about a bunch of kids saving the world with children's card games!" and with that statement, everyone sweat dropped.

Suddenly, an exhausted Malik Ishtar walked onto the campus of Domino High. Usually loud and full of awkward energy, he dropped next to where .

"Malik? Are you okay? Too much work at the museum or something bro?" Tristan asked, taking note of the bags under the Egyptian's eyes. Malik sipped some of the coffee in the thermos he had, and yawned.

"I really don't know what's worse- being a tombkeeper forced to live underground for all eternity or taking care of a baby." he sighed.

"BABY?! Malik...why didn't you tell us you and Ry were havin g a baby!" Tea chirped. "I love babies!" "Not surprised." Yami muttered under his breath.

"WHAT IN RA's NAME ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?" the lilac eyed boy screamed.

"You said taking care of a baby-"

"You're a...erm... Mother?"

"What? NO NO! Not me thank Ra...actually I was watching a two week old demon. The baby isn't even mine."

Everyone thought for a few minutes.

" Kaiba's?"

"Ryou's?! Who's the daddy!?"

"Your sister's?"

Malik took a deep breath.

"No...Bakura and Marik just had a demo- I mean a baby."


	2. The Explanation

Oh man, I completely forgot to mention **Read** and **REVIEW** ! Hahaha, but anyways, here's chapter 2, "The Explanation" lol.

Although it's going to be Malik explaining how, the story will be doing more flashbacks to define the creation of this sweet devil from Hell.

Marik: How many times do I have to tell you, this baby is not evil!

Me: HUSH AND DON'T SPOIL ANYTHING!

Bakura: Anywho...she doesn't own us thank Zorc nor this series. Read and Review to learn about this little monster called my kid.

* * *

"Your telling me, that Marik, and Bakura, had a baby?! How is that even possible?" Yugi asked, while Yami looked extremely pale n the face. "Please tell me they adopted..." Joey was just as shocked at the idea of a child.

"Honestly guys, it's a scary story. At least for us. Ryou is still scarred for life as well. I mean I love that child as a nephew but something is not right! " Malik shook Yugi.

Tristan shoved Malik off of him, seeing how the Egyptian was freaking out at the thoughts . As Malik collected himself, he checked his phone and read his text message out loud:

**"Hikari; we just got Ryou back from the Shadow Realm. Can you get some formula while your out? Thx lighter half!" - Marik**

"Why on Earth was Ryou in the Shadow Realm!?" Tea asked. "Is that why he was absent about two days now?"

"Okay, let me start from the beginning. "

**_9 Months Ago_**

"YOUR MINE THIEF!"

"I WILL STEAL WHAT'S LEFT OF YOUR SANITY!"

"I SHALL TAKE WHAT IS MINE!"

"FASTER!"

"NNYAAAHHHH..."

Malik and Ryou look terrified, as they heard the screams coming from upstairs.

"Mal, do you suppose we should-"

"Heck no Ry, they usually have knives next to their bed. "

"For what purpose?!"

"Koi, leave it to your imagination." Malik shuddered at the thought, and pulled a blanket over him and Ryou.

The screams continued for another 15 minutes. "I CANNOT SLEEP WITH THIS MADNESS! I'm gonna-" Ryou got up, and planted a kiss on an enraged Malik. "Your gonna relax, and I'm gonna go upstairs and silence them since they dislike your hostility."

Ryou made his way upstairs, and knocked on the door.

**(On the other side of the door)**

"WHAT?!"

"Malik if you say one word I'm gonna cock block you and-"

"It's Ryou! Look Malik is annoyed, and we would really appreciate it if you guys quiet down." The soft spoken boy said without even touching the door. "Yadounshi I hope you know we hear when your topping every other night!" Ryou turned red at that comment, while Marik cackled like a maniac.

"Look either please be quiet or do it somewhere else! We don't care where but please stop before the police come-again!" Already embarrassed, he walked away slowly hoping the red in his cheeks would fade.

He found Malik went to their bedroom and left the couch. Luckily they sleep downstairs.

Malik looked up from the large bed he was snuggled in comfortably.

"Ryou! Your alive baby ! But how?" Malik asked as Ryou got into the bed. "I don't know, Bakura usually won't hurt me, and Marik was just... Laughing." Now the white haired boy blushed again. "Oh don't tell me those sickos .." "They heard us.." Malik's eyes went like saucers, and they immediately pulled the covers over them. "Night Ry!" "Night Mal!"

**-Meanwhile Upstairs-**

"Now, where did I leave off?" Marik pounced on Bakura, smirking.

"Marik they're gonna bitch again if we start. Should we wait til they go off to school or something and fuck on the kitchen counter or something again?" the recovering boy asked.

"Aww no fair I can't wait til breakfast to get a taste of my Baku-Chan!" Marik pouted, still on top of Bakura. Suddenly , Bakura had a devious look on his face.

"Let's play more,"

"That's the spirit !"

"In the _Shadow Realm_..."

Marik cocked and eyebrow. Surely they have spoken about it several times, but this time Bakura was serious.

"Are you sure we should be fucking with the Shadow Realm?"

"Aren't you suppose to be fucking ME?"

With that, they started to glow a purple/blue color and disappear into the darkness which is known as the Shadow Realm.

* * *

Marik: OH YEAHHHHHH!

Me: Relax. No dirty scenes. We gotta pick this up quickly since I start school soon.

Bakura: Then let's send all those wretched teachers to the Shadow Realm!

Me: You would want that as well huh?

Bakura: ... READ AND REVIEW


	3. The News Pt 1

Well, all I can say is updates will be slower, (due to college) but reviews would help alot too .

Bakura: Once you get to the good part, people will actually want to read more!

Marik: its like hunting, its boring waiting, but once you get to stab its like sweet bliss !

Me: O_o okaayyyyy...so read and review please !

* * *

Although disturbed, Yugi and the gang were interested in the rest of the story about Marik and Bakura's baby.

"They did it in the Shadow Realm?" Yami asked, assuming he figured out how this happened.

"Yeah I mean you guys don't have to live with the constant shouting or destruction of things! Anywhere but home! I mean they sleep WITH KNIVES!" Malik groaned.

"That's ... I don't know. I must say you and Ryou are very strong as a couple." Tea admit.

"And why don't you and Ryou throw them out? I mean, if they cause THAT much trouble, make them tough it out on the streets." Joey insisted , but Malik only sighed.

"If we did that then the population of Domino would be cut in half- it's better to keep an eye out."

Yugi giggled , knowing its true. They were a handful, and even Yami knew firsthand of the torture they can cause.

"How was the pregnancy stage? I mean when my mom had Serenity it wasn't fun!" the blonde boy admitted, although being too young to remember every detail.

Malik rolled his gorgeous violet eyes, and let out a huge UGHHHH.

"It was terrible. Well honestly they are pretty loving and nurturing to the spawn of hell but I was scared shitless that this baby would be cursed with a terrible life. They think all the weird stuff is fine."

"How did you and Ryou react? I mean its THEM." Tristan added.

_**-Flashback-**_

Ryou was getting ready for school, when he saw Bakura laying at the kitchen table with some Egyptian book, ginger ale and a small plate of saltine crackers.

"Yami, are you okay? You look really tired , do you need me to take care of you?" The smaller white haired boy asked feeling his dark half's forehead. Bakura, although hostile towards the boyfriend and Malik, gently put his hand over Ryou's.

"I'm fine. Just go to school." Bakura was very short worded, which wasn't like him when he felt ill or irritated. Ryou knew something wasn't right, and noticed how he consistently told him and Malik leave him alone. Even Marik was sleeping on the couch!

"Kura', if you and Marik are fighting, just end it -"

"We're not! Ugh, I'm very tired yadounshi. I'm going to bed." He tried to get up and walk to the stairs. All Ryou did was watch, quietly following Bakura, taking note of him gripping the railing as if his life depended on it.

"This isn't right one bit."

As soon as Bakura fell onto the bed he usually shared with Marik, Ryou intruded.

"How many times do -"

"ENOUGH! Something is wrong with you Kura'! You ignore me , you sleep almost 20 hours a day, you're not eating ! I make you your favorite steaks and your always throwing up , claiming you have a 'bug' but really? Who on earth has a stomach flu for two months?! " the British teen was determined to find out. Sure, Bakura could be an asshole and once previously abused his body when they shared , but he was still family in his eyes.

Bakura got up, with an expressionless gaze. Ryou wasn't sure if he was about to swing, stab, or start screaming, or the worst ; what if Marik had a curse going on?

Ryou flinched when Bakura reached out . But he reached for Ryou's hand, and held it for a good five seconds.

"Bakura?"

With a swift pull, he placed Ryou's hand on his stomach, and looked at him dead in the eyes,

"THIS is why."

* * *

DUN DUN DUN !

So Ryou learns about it first.

Malik will shortly find out, but this is Malik telling the gang about Bakura being pregnant. I already said this story is not going to be detailing the whole "pregnancy", just highlight the aspects so we can watch the bundle of joy terrorize the world.

Bakura: by the Gods please don't put my name and the p word TOGETHER.

Me: Bakura being pregnant?

Bakura: REVIEW AND READ WHATEVER ORDER YOU MORTALS USE.


End file.
